Long overdue Update

I happend upon my blog this morning and found an anonymous comment to my last post. Life has surely been busy.

I had a baby boy named Yousef on July 14th. This one sweet little baby who officially sent us on a new journey one that was nearly 7 years in the making. We put off having children for a long time due to my husband's immigration situation so he is the ultimate symbol of a normal life for us. Life is just that. Normal. I'm still working nights but with a different schedule and less hours than I was before. This allows me to stay home with Yousef during the day, and my husband care for Yousef at night while I work. As far as my little men are concerned, I am a stay at home mommy. It's a lot of work but it's very rewarding. I haven't felt so happy in such a long time and inshaAllah it will continue.

Abdurahman is now in the second grade. He loves school especially math, and he does very well. He's a wonderful big brother.

My husband is working. It's long hours and the money isn't as good as when he was over the road, but I have a gread job and we're together. That's all that matters.

As for me, I'm healing. I'm learning to come to terms with what's happened in our lives, and I'm slowly moving on. I don't have those constant nagging feels like I did a year ago. It's still there just not as much. I'm loving this life we're living, and I wanted to thank everyone for their thoughts and prayers during that difficult time in my life.

Lazy Saturday Mornings

I'm enjoying some peace and quiet on this lovely Saturday morning. My husband is at work and Abdu is at Arabic school. I sit here thinking about the lovely breakfast of fresh croissants and coffee we just ate while watching my ever expanding belly bounce around. It is a wonderful feeling.

Life had been very good lately. Normal. Routine. Almost mundane. Still, it's good.

I really have no clue what to write, and really I feel as though my brain is on vacation. I think I'll go for a list. Lists are fun, right? If not, just humor me. Please.

1. Abdu is doing great in the first grade. His teacher believes in him and pushes him to do better. His abilities in math and science have landed him in a math mentorship program with Lockheed Martin. He attends a special class in a small group on Wednesdays, and he enjoys coming home to show me all of the "hard stuff" he learned. He struggles a bit on the playground, but things are improving. He's begun to take taekwondo classes after school and that has given him some confidence outside of the classroom amongst his peers.

2. Abdu is also doing great in his arabic and islamic studies. I've seen so much improvement in the last 4 or 5 months. He just seems so eager to learn, and he loves it when he does well. He's well behaved and polite at school....always wanting his teachers to be proud of him. My husband picks him up from school for some much needed man time together.

3. I'm still working nights in that Pathology lab. I'm getting much more sleep than I previously was, and planning for an extended hiatus(3 months) from work in July. I'll return to work part-time(30hrs/week) until I feel the baby is old enough to be in childcare.

4. Speaking of the baby. I recently had my first ultrasound and things are looking well. It was a long exam that included a meeting with a genetic counselor, a level 2 ultrasound and a fetal echo. All of this was because of Abdu's congenital heart defect. The good news is that baby looks great...growing on schedule with no apparent body or heart defects. I do know the sex, but I cannot share :) My husband wants to be suprised so I have to keep it a secret. I've only told my immediate family. You will find out with everyone else in about 4 months.

5. Husband is doing well. He's a very hard worker, and I'm proud of the accomlishments he's made in such a short time. We are now approaching 8 months since his return home. We have settled into a more comfortable routine, and I've been able to undo a lot of the damage that my MIL and SIL did to him while he was in Algeria.

I'll attempt to come back to update in a few weeks after I have my next prenatal check-up.

Pathetic attempts at blogging

Looks like my poor little blog is getting more neglected as each week passes. I don't know what it is, but I've never been able to get into blogging like I wanted to.

I've been notified by CNCZ that I need a new blog post because the last one makes her bawl. Well, this is for you my fellow married to a crazy algerian sister :)

Deciding whether or not to share this with the world has been difficult. I wasn't sure if it was too soon, but here goes nothing....I'm pregnant!!!! Yup, I'm gonna have another stinky little half american, half algerian baby. I hesitated to share this with you all because in these 5 months I've already been pregnant, misscarried and pregnant again. I'm so afraid that I will somehow mess things up by sharing so please send a big mashaAllah and lots of prayers our way.

My hormone levels seem to be extremely high. I am sick to my stomach and throwing up all hours of the night and day. I'm exhausted, and I've lost about 6lbs. I normally would be super excited about the weight loss, but I'm just so hungry. Too bad for me because I can't seem to keep anything down.

We obviously haven't told Abdurrahman that we're going to have a baby, but he knows somehow. Any time I complain about being sick, he tells me it's that baby in my stomach that is making me sick. He says he's a genius and his brain told him about the baby. MashaAllah I guess he is.

I think he's going to be a great big brother. He's waited so long for this, and I'm super excited for him.....and for us. It's another step towards normalcy and towards putting this awful nightmare behind us.

OH....I haven't shared this news with my entire family or friends so if anyone I know in real life reads this please do not mention this to anyone yet.

Where to start?

I want to start by thanking everone for their kind words and well wishes. I hope that you all had a blessed Ramadhan and Eid.

As you all probably expected, I haven't had much time for my dear little blog. What's new, right?

We are working hard to become a family again and meshing our lives together after such a long difficult time apart. It's not always easy, but this was expected. However, it sure does feel great when things go right. We're still ironing out all of the kinks.

Little things like smelling my husband's cologne when I walk in the door from work just grab me...it travels throughout the house. While my two men are still asleep in their beds, I inhale the cologne before crawling into a my not so big not so lonely bed. I find myself staring at him constantly, smothering him with hugs and kisses, asking him to look at recipes with me or test the food that I am cooking. Small everyday things that people take for granted that I had forcibly taken from my family over two and half years ago.

I find myself sitting on the sofa thinking about random things. When was that? Was he here when it happened? Was it before he left of after? It's all a blur. I have shed more tears in the two months since he has returned than I shed the entire time that he was gone. I cried for the loss of moments that we can never recapture. It's amazing how my husband left this little 3 year old baby and returned to a 6 year old man...he's a big boy now. He's loving having his baba back home. I have seen such positive changes in his attitude, behavior and demeanor in such a short period of time.

Please continue to pray for our family as we transition into this new chapter of our lives together.

I almost forgot to add that Abdu had his annual cardiology checkup a few weeks ago. Abdu's doctors played a huge part in the return of my husband, and the last appointment my husband attended was in 2006. The doctor was just so pleased to see my husband. She offered a congratulations and was happy that she could help. She noted many positive changes in Abdu's demeanor before giving us the great news ever. He had a CT scan and echocardiogram earlier in the day. She informed us that his heart has improved over last year in every possible way. All of his abnormal numbers have lessened. What this means is that although his aorta and valves are not normal, he is on the low end of abnormal....VERY MILD. Now instead of an annual check-up he can wait for two years. We couldn't be more happy!

I can't hold it in any longer

My husband is coming home tomorrow inshaAllah. I wanted to wait. I didn't want to spoil it. I just can't hold it in any longer though. I had to share our good news.

Alhamdulillah our family is finally being reunited after 27 long months of harship and suffering.

May Allah bring us safely together in love, peace, and happiness. May he never let us forget the suffering that we endured. May he reward us for our effforts and forgive us our shortcomings. Ameen.

Travelling

On a bus. 10 hours. Through the desert. Back to Algiers. More time with his family. Goodbyes. Tears. On a plane. Back to me. Finally!

He'll be home soon. I can't say when, but it will be within the next few weeks inshaAllah. We're not telling anyone here the exact day of his arrival because we need to spend some time together before Abdu comes home and before the visitors start. You know how the muslims are with their visiting and their congratulations...

I suppose I'll be back to update when he has landed. See you all soon :)

Takeoff

Visa FINALLY in hand. Tickets Purchased. Shopping underway. Landing on.....wouldn't you like to know?!?!